Care package!
After two months of putting up a brave face and telling everybody how awesome my Boston life has been so far, I think I'm getting a bit homesick. People back home are having super fun-looking street hockey games, meeting celebrities, trailing sketchy-looking cars, making 15 consecutive "newspaper=GO" posts on the Gateway blog and shitting out novels in 30 days. In comparison, my roommate is so inept at making bacon that the firefighters almost came and I got a concussion and some pretty bruises from shopping. The end of October is shaping up to be a pretty depressing time when, fortunately, Tyson's care package arrived just in time!
Which is the awesomest care package EVAH!
The fabulosity of the content was hinted at with the cutout of Kimora Lee Simmons (wait ... should I drop the Simmons part?) The package was heavy, too! As if it might be a book!(BTW: my roommates are totally jealous that Tyson sends me stuff in decorated envelopes while their friends rarely send them anything, cool envelopes or not. My competitive spirit thanks Tyson for that.)
The content is even more awesome than the envelope decorations (as if that's possible)! Inside, is a copy of Very Important Pets, with, and I quote Tyson, "cover photo of Liz Taylor throwing her crazy Liz Taylor arms in the air with her crazy Liz Taylor dog on crazy Larry King." Crazy AWESOME!Inside, there are entries on Liberace's poodles (as if Liberace would own any other breed of dog), Paris Hilton's Tinkerbell, and even Hitler's dog, Blondie, along with unequivocal proof that Hitler was a jerk:
"When the Soviet Army closed in on Hitler's bunker in Berlin in 1945, Hitler and some of his staff planned to commit suicide by consuming cyanide. The first pellet was tested on Blondie. Blondie was initially buried in a shell crater near Hitler's bunker."Poor Blondie!
My only beef with the book is that they neglected to include Martha Stewart's chows. Especially Paw Paw. If I have a dog, I'll name him/her Paw Paw.
So thanks, Tyson, for lifting my spirits with this utterly fascinating book. You're the best roomie evernot that it's hard to achieve that distinction with the real roomies that I have. I mean, really, how hard is it to make bacon?!
posted by Tonka Time @ 3:24 PM
2 Comments:
It made me laugh that Hitler named his dog Blondie. Do you think if we were all our current ages in the WWII era that we'd be doing an Everyday Hitler comic?
Umm, if you and I were alive during Hitler's time, we'd be busy pulling an Ann Frank rather than risk drawing undue attentions to our non-blond hair and non-blue eyes.
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