When beer goggles lead you to a '91 Century

Sex pervert. I can't hyperlink. A must read. Go!

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The wardrobe equivalent of a mullet

From the waist up, this man is a hipster. The kind who would buy a blinding silver messenger bag and pair it with Urban Outfitters shirt. I would not be surprised if he has a pair of Wayfarers tucked in his front pocket.

Waist down, he's a man who wears track pants that are 2 sizes two short and white tube socks. I would not be surprised if he gets picked last in the middle school gym class.